Agnostic: Synonym for Pussy

well golly gee, i just can't decide

well golly gee, i just can't decide

“You know what, I know billions of people in the world believe in a god and millions of others have decided, after long periods of introspection, that they’re atheists, but I think I’m just going to sit on the fence on this one. Does God exist? Well Marty, I don’t think I could say if he does or doesn’t exist. Guess I’ll just wait and see.”

Millions of Spineless Agnostics intensifying the pussification of America

So let me get this straight. In by far the most polarizing argument known to mankind, there is a growing contingent of people who can’t decide? I guess they figure all those philosophers throughout history were just wasting their time.

To paraphrase David Hume: ‘All rational statements that assert a factual claim about the universe that begin “I believe that ….” are simply shorthand for, “Based on my knowledge, understanding, and interpretation of the prevailing evidence, I tentatively believe that….”‘

What kind of spineless, bullshit, ball-shrinking nonsense is that? What the fuck is the point? I mean, isn’t it obvious that nobody can ever be 100% sure about any factual claim about the universe? Fucking of course it is. Does that mean you can’t make ridiculous assertive claims about the universe that you are not 100% sure about? No, of course you fucking can.

Nobody in the history of the universe was ever 100% sure about anything. All great men in history pretended to know more than they did, got a little bit of luck, then took credit for the luck. It’s really that simple. Does anybody really think Barack Obama “knows we’re going to pull together and get through this tough time”? Only fools. Obviously, he doesn’t “know” anything. He makes a judgement call based on incomplete information, relies on some luck, then takes credit for the luck. It’s the oldest trick in the book.

These “agnostics” are popping up nowadays because we don’t have enough wars to kill them off. You know what happened to agnostics in any of the real wars in history? Them, their wives, and their children were slaughtered by whichever side won the war because the agnostics didn’t join the winning side. Not picking a side is the same as picking the losing side in all life or death scenarios. No exceptions.

Simply put, human beings are naturally polarized because it was the most polarized individuals in ethnic/religious groups who killed off the less polarized (pussier and less organized) agnostics.

The moral of the story is to pick the winning side after you study all the information. Because being agnostic (picking no side) is the equivalent to picking the losing side.

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13 Comments

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13 responses to “Agnostic: Synonym for Pussy

  1. Draffish

    I would suggest not just reading Wiki (that is where that quote came from is it not) being an agnostic is not being on a fence, it means understanding that some things are unknowable and working from that point (like most great philosophers).

  2. Ryan

    “I guess they figure all those philosophers throughout history were just wasting their time.”

    That is more or less correct …or rather, since all of these philosophers thought about it already, that means I don’t have to. Thanks guys.

  3. Ryan

    Also don’t listen to Draffish, I would definitely suggest just reading Wiki. It is an awesome convenient substitute for laborious and time-consuming research.

  4. By definition an agnostic makes no claims based on belief, which is rational in a debate which cannot be proven either way. You can no more disproved the existence of a god than prove it. Many of a reductionist outlook prefer not to even engage in a debate with no demonstrable outcome. It’s silly either way.

  5. On the first day of a philosophy course the professor asked, “How many of you believe there is a God?” About 7 raised their hands. Then he asked, “How many of you don’t believe there’s a God?” About the same number of students raised their hands. “How many don’t know if a God exists or not?” he asked. When about 12 raised their hands he shouted, “What do you mean you don’t know! Of course you know you cowards!!”

    I’m still not sure if he was joking or not.

    I too used to think agnosticism was for pussies. But the more I think about it, I either admire their honesty and humbleness towards the universe as we won’t ever really know as you’ve said, or hate that they don’t care enough to make up their minds as most agnostics don’t care. But is fighting for the wrong side better than not having the courage to fight at all? Is an abusive father really any better than an absent father?

    So which side are you on? A DC Hero can’t be a hypocritical “pussy” can he? =)

  6. I would suggest not just reading Wiki (that is where that quote came from is it not)

    Uh, no, that quote isn’t from “Wiki”, it’s from a poem in Monolithos. Maybe you should read Wiki to find out what that is.

    Jane, I would say if someone feels they are truly agnostic, they should take a theist or atheist viewpoint as it suits their interests. Since they feel each outcome is equally probable, there is no dishonesty in the duality, and they gain the maximum benefit of their agnosticism.

    So which side are you on? A DC Hero can’t be a hypocritical “pussy” can he?

    I have invented my own religious beliefs, which is what any rational man would do when faced with 3 fatally flawed choices: theism, atheism, and agnosticism. I am working on formulating this belief system for the masses in hopes that I will become the new L. Ron Hubbard. When it’s ready I will share with the class. I guarantee it will be nothing less than great.

  7. Ferk

    An agnostic is an atheist. Agnostics don’t believe in gods, they just can’t prove its nonexistence but they strongly disagree with every religious belief, by definition.

    The question of the existence of gods could be, at some extent, compared to the existence of aliens, UFOs and extraterrestrial living beings.
    The most skeptical and reasonable answer is that there are no proofs of it, and also no disproofs.
    Any other belief is just that, a belief, and it must be respected as long as it is kept as it is. As long as we all agree with this, then it is ok. If you really believe that

    Sometimes it IS necessary to take a position for practical reasons. And normally what is not falseable is considered out of the question. Every agnostic is pure atheist in this aspect, as he will consider gods as nonexistant, but they know why. Instead of constantly repeating “god doesn’t exist”, they repeat “god is unfalseable”, agnosticism is an approach more skeptical and cold.

    To me, it doesn’t really matter who wins a war. Winning a war won’t make people more right on what they believe. But I would prefer that it was the reasoning who wins, instead of the believing. Now is religion, tomorrow might be pseudoscience. When beliefs are confused with truth they are harmful for knowledge.

  8. emach

    Agnosticism is more intellectually honest than either side. Often times, admitting that you don’t know is better than guessing wrong. WMDs, anyone?

    It’s fine and dandy to take a side on God without evidence because it doesn’t matter. In all likelihood the question will never be settled, so side-minded people can sit around and take sides until the cows come home without fear of finding out they’re wrong.

    When it comes to actual positions that matter, agnosticism is very often the way to go. When guessing wrong has consequences, admitting you have no idea and spending time investigating the issue instead of defending a position chosen arbitrarily without evidence either way is a much more productive use of your time.

  9. Chris Obeso

    It is difficult to believe in anything when you are not truly convinced whether it is fact or not. Many people choose to accept a certain religion as an insurance policy, therefore avoiding fire and brimstone upon their demise. I believe it is ok to accept the fact that there are certain things that we just don’t know in life but I also believe it is our duty to seek the answer. I know there is something out there and am convinced of that but I’m not sure who is right when it comes down to a certain religion. I don’t believe that makes me a pussy. I do agree, however, that a person should do their best to act according to the morals and principals they choose in life or they are simply walking the fine line of hypocrisy. And by not standing up to their so called convictions, they are also being a pussy. I am willing to accept the fact that I do not know and I am not going to accept someone else’s viewpoint out of fear of being chastised. This is my stand.

  10. Jack Meof

    YOUR AN IDIOT, THIS SITE SUCKS lol

  11. soveryMIS

    I read this and I must say, I respect your honesty. To start off, I am Agnostic. I don’t believe that being Agnostic is being “pussy” at all, and I’ll tell you why. Just as you said we “feel each outcome is equally probable” because as you also said in you original blog “Nobody in the history of the universe was ever 100% sure about anything”. So if we feel like each outcome is equally probable becasue nothing is never 100%, then it would be understandable why someone is Agnostic. But I think what you’re saying is, that since philosophers and other people basically “wing-it” based on their knowledge, that’s what we should do too. What you fail to understand though is that the things that they just accepted were/are capable of being proven or disproven. When it comes to religion however, we literally know nothing, so we have no concrete knowledge to “wing” off of, anything we think we know was either told to us by other people who, just like us, truly have no idea but claim they do, or from a book called the Bible (or Qu’ran or any other religious book), and that’s the problem: none of those sources are trustworthy, since we as humans don’t know, and any Holy Book was written by a human, which makes it biased altogether. So in all honesty, we know nothing of religion, it’s kind of like a old story that’s been passed on from decade to decade, in which no one knows it’s true origin or if there is any truth to it. But for some reason many people believe in these Holy Books and never question there credibility. The belief in a god is also flawed because there is no proof that he created this Earth, we ALMOST know for a fact that he didn’t write the Bible or personally dictate someone into doing so, and we can’t ask him to show himself because the Bible requires us to believe in him strictly based on faith, so there is no proof. On top of that, in the Bible, magical things happen that science can’t prove. So now you think, “Well then you’re an Athiest!” Wrong. Same way as there is no proof that he is there, there isn’t any proof that he isn’t, believing that anything is possible, if God is real and he is a superhuman than the bizarre things in the Bible would be possible and our HUMAN science of course, would not be able to explain those strange occurences because Superhuman science (God) would overpower and break the rules of Human science (us) because it would be one giant step ahead of us. So unfortunately, you can’t just “wing-it” with religion if you really care about it because you don’t have “both sides to the story”. For example if your friend told you that he/she got into a fight with someone and it was all that person’s fault, you can’t just blatantly believe that person (assuming that you actually care) because there is still one side unaccounted for, which means more info to be analyzed. And although you could never really know what happened because you were never there, you have a greater chance of knowing when you know both sides of the story because you may just believe your friend’s word, when in actuality they were wrong and lied to you. Story may seem pointless, but if you think the same way of religion, you would understand. There are two sides, the believer’s perspective, and the non-believer’s perspective. Now human believer’s are just telling others their side of the story, about how God is real and he is our master, but we don’t know the truth because there isn’t any proof of a God’s existence. But most people just blindly choose a side, based on other’s OPINIONS, forgetting that an opinion is a thought, not a fact. But since there is no concrete proof from either side, whether there is a God or not because both sources aren’t 100% credible since all of the information is not there, we choose to be neutral because instead of just choosing impatiently, we all are waiting for that day (if it ever comes) for all the information to be there so that we can make a valid conclusion because we actually care to seek the truth.

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