Why Girls Can’t Argue

Early in life, girls are taught that if they’re in an argument with a man and they can’t win, they should cry. I’m not knocking this because it’s an extremely effective strategy that will usually end up in the girl getting what she wants, but what this means is that girls don’t develop the awesome power of wit and logic that men use to control the world later in life. In fact, a girl’s power to get her way by crying will diminish as she gets older. Let me stop to make a graph of how the different sexes gain and lose power with age:

You should notice how girls quickly become more special (and more powerful) than boys because they are cuter kids and are therefore loved more. Also notice the crossing point which can not exactly be determined by this graph and it’s lack of scale. I like to call that point “the great reversal”, but I’m sure there’s better names then that.

Anyway, the point is that women can’t argue. I would personally never hire a woman for a lawyer unless I wanted to get convicted to break my lost twin brother out of jail from the inside. Can you imagine if your woman lawyer had some type of emotional crisis (her husband cheating on/leaving her, a missed period, a bad hair day, etc.) when your virgin ass was on the line? Women may be able to learn how to argue by suppressing their femininity, but it isn’t ingrained in them because they didn’t learn it in childhood. The emo override will always get hit when the stress is highest. That’s probably the main reason there’s no female front line soldiers, if that’s still the case.

Personally, I never give in to the tears because I can see right through their tactics. I look at it like when a girl starts crying in an argument, it’s the equivalent to a guy telling me “yeah, you’re right.” At that point, I can scale down my hostility and she should scale down her tears accordingly. If she doesn’t follow suit, then she’s doing nothing but crying for attention. At that point I will be able to put another mark in the victory column by walking away.

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10 Comments

Filed under Self Improvement

10 responses to “Why Girls Can’t Argue

  1. Man, this is not my experience at all. I canned my first (male) divorce attorney many years ago because he was useless and hired a female on the recommendation of a friend. She was terrific and is largely the reason I’m not on some government payout program today.

    Also, my wife is incredibly quick and will turn an argument in a heartbeat. Without tears. No way I’d want to go up against her in a debate.

  2. That graph is incredible. Nice work.

  3. Me

    Weren’t we just discussing the great-reversal in relationships the other day? When women all the sudden get the power and men have absolutely no idea how they’ve lost it? I think there’s too much give and take within the sexes to concrete this with such a bold statement. I mean what about your whole concept of alpha/beta males? You’re not giving them any of the credit or lack of credit that they deserve.

    Also, I learned many many moons ago that crying won’t get you anywhere in a real battle. Sexual jealousy on the other hand, always will.

  4. i don’t know…i never used crying to win arguments with you early on. remember when i said, “if you don’t give me that I’ll tell mom you hit me?” it worked then…i wonder if it still works now?

  5. @Me: Yes, the relationship graph is much different. I definitely have to write about that, that will be a hall of fame post. To give you a peek in my mind, the graph I made her and presented as a general purpose graph is really a graph of me and a girl who shall forever remain nameless. Sexual jealousy is really just a subemotion of fear, which is what the crying should instill in it’s target. I’d argue the effects can be remarkably similar.

    @Ava: Sometimes I hate that you read this blog. No, that tactic wouldn’t work now. But notice how it’s similar to crying because it’s basically admitting that you can’t win without resorting to something distinctively feminine.

  6. Pingback: boys don t cry

  7. Sergey

    and theeeen, why girls aren’t funny, yes?

  8. johnny five

    dude, you have to make a second graph, which shows Marriage.
    as x –> Marriage(-), the blue curve slopes rapidly downward and the pink curve slopes rapidly upward.
    if x > Marriage, then blue(x) = 0 and pink(x) = +infinity.

    just sayin’

  9. this graph is for single individuals. the relationship graph is much more complicated, so i’ve decided i should present it in tabular format.

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