Link of the Day: Understanding Suicide

suicide knob

I’ve always found suicide to be a very interesting subject. This article talks about the “hows” of suicide instead of the “whys” that are so often discussed. Really interesting. It makes the obvious but often overlooked point of how illogical people are when they attempt suicide. My favorite passage:

[A man attempting suicide] had picked out a spot on the western promenade that he wanted to jump from, but separated by six lanes of traffic, he was afraid of getting hit by a car on his way there.

You might not know that guns are involved in twice as many suicides as homicides and self-inflicted gun wounds are by far the most effective form of suicide. In studying survivors of these attempts, an astonishing 24% of them decided to shoot themselves within 5 minutes of the attempt. They don’t exactly think it through. So it stands to reason that putting time between when someone decides to commit suicide and when they actually do it will help the situation.

My solution:

Have government run suicide clinics that offer ways to commit suicide not available to the common man like guillotine in public, riding on a missile, and being thrown out of a spaceship with no spacesuit. However, for those who sign up and follow through with suicide, the government will double cross them after they take them into the suicide transport vehicle and force them to eat a pill they are told is cyanide (but is really a strong tranquilizer). Then they will take them to a secret island in the South Pacific where they will be convinced they are in Purgatory and put on television in a show eerily reminiscent of the Truman Show, but there are many more “non-actors” mixed in with the actors. Money from the profits of this show would go into Suicide prevention programs. I’m pretty sure you could get someone bent on committing suicide to sign the forms to make this happen legally. The only question is: who would be against it?

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3 Comments

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3 responses to “Link of the Day: Understanding Suicide

  1. Kasey

    Healthcare insurers would be against it because you’re taking someone out of the system… unless of course, they could file a Medicare claim for “assisted placebo suicide” and get reimbursed.

  2. Steve Johnson

    Would be tough to get people to sign up for it after they’ve seen the show where the cast is all non-actors who think they committed suicide. People might realize that the gvt suicide wasn’t on the level.

  3. Steve, I think the suicide clinics would have to close before the show started airing, which would be a downside.

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