Girls are Boring

After approaching a few hundred young women, me and this guy concluded that it was shocking how few interesting things girls actually had to say. I mean, if you’re a girl and you go to a bar to talk to guys (have guys come up and talk to you), for the love of God at least have something interesting to say. I can’t even begin to count how many awful stories I’ve heard about “my crazy friends” while I’m standing there bored to tears trying to figure out if I can snort some of my beer if I tilt the bottle over far enough.

I think it has a lot to do with women in groups, since this is how they go out on the town. Girls are incredibly boring by themselves, and this effect is magnified in groups since the inertia just builds. While guys befriend girls for the emotional support and the indirect ass, girls befriend guys for much needed fun and excitement. Luckily, those needs are not in conflict with each other.

I used to think girls didn’t do many fun things because they were too conservative or nervous to try them. But then I learned the truth of how lame and unimaginative they really are. A very wise man once said: “If I was gay, I would never talk to a woman unless I absolutely had to. They are completely worthless.” That man was me in 2004. I am a prophet to my own gospel.

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18 Comments

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18 responses to “Girls are Boring

  1. we also learned that drinking to excess, while always fun, is also not a very good way to improve one’s game.

  2. Dude, girls don’t have a monopoly on boring. I once had a guy corner me and list every feature of his car. Then I asked if he’d watched any movies lately, and he said, “Cars,” and went back to talking about – you guessed it – his car. I bet his favorite band is The Cars, his mother’s name is Carlotta, and he’s going to change his name to Carson. I hope the whole episode was a surreal joke.

    I’ll admit a lot of younger girls are pretty dull – I think I was almost 30 before I had more than a couple of female friends. There are only so many conversations you can have about manicures before you want to kill yourself.

  3. Shannon, wasn’t that obviously a joke? A hilarious one at that. Men are masters of sarcasm.

  4. I was really really hoping it was all a joke, I love sarcastic oddballs. But, no, eventually I worked out that he was quite serious. Otherwise I probably would have married the guy.

  5. yeah i know if i’m trying to steer the conversation in another directions – its’ better to just get out

  6. Jo

    Shit, I’ll agree and I’m a girl. Some girls ARE incredibly boring. All they talk about is how drunk they got the night before, and shopping.

    Those are also the girls most guys want to JUST sleep with and not talk to.

    But like Shannon said, there are just as many boring guys.

  7. Hope

    I agree. I’m so boring I bore the crap out of myself. I have to read a bunch of different websites and articles just to keep from falling into a black hole of total boredom from which I can never climb out.

    P.S. I’m already bored again after reading this blog entry and making this comment. Off to the next website!

  8. It is only the pretty ones that are boring.

  9. susan, pretty girls and pretty boys get the benefit of the doubt, including being judged on how interesting they are, that’s all

  10. Wow Hero. Way to bite off my point. Good thing I’m back to reading this blog. Someone’s gotta brighten this shit up. And girls what’s the point of just reiterating how boring you are? Have a little more respect for your sex jesus christ. And Susan, let’s get serious the pretty ones are what make girls interesting. If not for them…I’d be gay.

  11. Me

    So for the most part I agree with this nonsense, although it is certainly not a new idea. However I must say that the shit women have to put up with for free drinks is sometimes unbearable. Take tonight for example. Out in Arlington, Va consisted of: one part pretending to be interested in hunting, a dash of feigning interest in college sports, and a whole freakin handful of making you believe that the phone number I gave you was real. And all that amounted to was a Miller Light. So hero, believe you me, its not just girls that are boring…

  12. Frankie

    What a shame.

  13. “Girls what’s the point of just reiterating how boring you are?”

    I’m not a “girl,” for starters. 🙂

    Girls are boring, whereas women are interesting.

    I didn’t have a lot of female friends until I was almost 30, because a lot of youger women either talked about boring stuff or saw me as competition. I mostly hung out with guys. Eventually my peers grew up and diversified their interests, thereby becoming more interesting.

  14. johnny five

    women inhabit the middle of the bell curve on just about everything.

    so, for the same reason supergenius girls and mentally retarded girls are rare, super-interesting girls are rare – but so are girls on the left side of the boring-interesting bell curve. in other words, you’ll never meet a girl as boring as gerald p. throckmorton iii the tax accountant.

  15. ro42g

    Cosign this post. Girls are boring as fuck. They don’t have anything to talk about. I’ve met like two interesting girls in my entire life. When I met them they weren’t as boring as most women and they got more interesting the more time we spent together.

    In that way women are like emotional leeches. They try to take your whole steez and personality from you. It’s less about them changing you and more about them wanting to change themselves just so they can keep up. How lame is that?

  16. dude, girls are boring- all of them. and ro42g: word. perhaps you should look into therapy- some boring ass chick really effed you up.

  17. One determination of emotional maturity in a female is when she FINALLY realizes that a male simply being civil to her is not an indication of his desiring her physically.

    It is surprising how many USA females never mature emotionally.

  18. Poppy

    All you people must be white. The frakkin hilarious aspect of this is that all you people, especially the guys, think you are so fluckin interesting. At least the girls admit they are boring. But white males, I have seen, tend to be just as mind-numbingly boring as the females.

    Nah. All white people are seriously boring as frick. I have plenty of Asian friends, and they are quite weird and fascinating.

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