Hitting on Girls in Front of their Boyfriends

Sometimes in life, I get bored. Sometimes I take a look around a bar and let out one of those boredom sighs while I look at my drink and figure out how I can possibly entertain myself for a few minutes while I’m waiting for someone or while I’m finishing my drink and trying to figure out where I can go to next.

It’s times like these that I issue myself Personal Honor Challenges (PHCs). It’s best to have a wingman egging you on to do things you’d issue PHCs for, but this isn’t always an option. This tactic is eerily similar to the DC Hero Drinking Game where you get 1 point for telling someone else to drink and you get 2 points for telling yourself to drink. Pulling off a combo is a 3-pointer. And of course, the points don’t mean anything because like everyone who’s over the age of 15 should know, it doesn’t matter who wins drinking games.

Anyway, hitting on a girl in front of her boyfriend is a fantastic PHC. But there’s a few things you need to keep in mind when you do this:

  1. Make sure you can kick the guy’s ass if he tries to fight you
  2. Wait until he leaves her side to make your approach, you want him to “catch you in the act” to get the most excitement out of this situation
  3. Pick a girl who you’d classify as a “no-doubter” (there’s no doubt you could pick her up if she was single)
  4. The drunker she is the better
  5. Try to isolate her from her friends who will try to save her
  6. No matter what happens, stay until they walk away from you or until 10 minutes elapse, whichever happens first. At that point let out a satisfied smile and move on. You’re not trying to actually pick her up, you’re trying to entertain yourself.

Another great PHC is using “the mumble” as a pickup line. In this challenge, the idea is to prove that opening lines don’t mean anything by mumbling a stumble of incomprehensible nonsense to a girl, followed by an attentive pause. If she asks you “What?” like 88% of females I surveyed, give her an expression that can best be described as ‘expecting an answer.’ This will really make her think. In fact, ‘Making Her Think’ is an unstoppable and timeless flirting tactic that requires space of it’s own. That’s next in my queue.

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8 Comments

Filed under dating

8 responses to “Hitting on Girls in Front of their Boyfriends

  1. I’m feeling this mumble opener. How about the backwards opener..

    Bang go to leave let’s?

  2. T.

    The mumble opener. That’s hot. Ha!

  3. rob

    i enjoyed your drinking game…seems to get real sloppy real quickly though….

    i can see the mumble opener working…and depending on how bored you are, which is a direct linear relationship to how stupid you are willing to be, you can tell her what you said could be anywhere from witty to obscene….or if you had matching tribal tattoos on your biceps you could avoid the whole needing to talk to the girls and move right into the bedroom simply by flexing.

  4. Robin

    I have also used the mumble as a way to completely embarrass a man. You just say something obscene like, “go fuck yourself?” (the question mark provides even more confusion) and as they say “what” you repeat very loudly in front of all his frat brothers “GO FUCK YOURSELF.” He will be left at a complete loss for words. He will try to come up with a snappy recovery and won’t be able to so his friends will just break his balls the rest of the night, it’s priceless.

  5. i’ve been a victim of the mumbler…well at least now i know this is just some game, i use to think it was “cute”

  6. Jack Meof

    your an idiot, get a hobby.

  7. ChadBroChill

    ^^agreed.. hitting on other guy’s girlfriends isnt cool or funny, it’s just bitchy. sorry i’m a bit late.

  8. Jack

    Guys like you deserve to be gelded. You have no right to hit on another man’s woman. I hope that one day some pissed off boyfriend beats the shit out of you.

    Go fuck yourself you little shit

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